Loyalty in a relationship is the strongest adhesive that can bind two souls together beyond comparison. Loyalty and trust are undeniably the core components of a healthy relationship, something which is quite rare these days, yet all of us dream of it. Just like the foundation of a building that strengthens its base, trust and loyalty reinforces the bond of our love life. But often, the lines between loyalty and disloyalty can be blurred out, leaving us confused and puzzled. Hence we will be talking about how the very slight changes and arrangements can help us to build a faithful, trusting relationship. The first and foremost requirement is to be loyal to thyself. Yes, you need to realize what you EXACTLY want and expect, and come in terms with it, before you can let your partner dive into your life. Ask yourself? What do you want from this relationship? Full commitment? Or do you need a bit more time to settle down? Or are you just casually dating and yet to figure things out? All three scenarios are perfectly fine, and there’s no shame in admitting one or the other. However, if you aren’t sure about your own expectations, then your partner will fail to understand you and this can cause major problems in the relationship. So be loyal to yourself first. Then tell your significant other what you desire and what you don’t. This single step can drastically change how you two see each other and improve your connection and bonding. Sharing each other’s thoughts and actions is also immensely important. Remember, your partner is not a mind reader, so unless and until you share your thoughts to them, they aren’t going to know about it. Also, one has to have a tolerant and understanding mentality to make sure that your lover also feels safe and comfortable in letting out what’s in their mind. Such a scenario is like a DEMAND FOR LOYALTY; where you show your partner that you’ve no fear to be faithful and have nothing to hide, and thus they can do the same, thus ensuring trust and honesty. Be compassionate and sincere in your approach whenever you’re having a conversation with your partner. If your partner opens up to you and confides to you about the one time he or she made a blunder at their job, remember, they have made themselves vulnerable to you and it’s your job to protect it. Do not scold them or mock them for their inability or mistakes; this will only discourage them from being honest and make them feel inferior. Instead, try to understand why they did what they did, and come up with a solution. Even if the sin is unforgivable, there is always a way to deal with it maturely instead of showing contempt or being abusive. Not only will this help your partner, but it’ll also ensure that they will continue to be honest and loyal to you in the future, instead of having the fear to be judged. However, you must show such loyalty to them as well, and thus share any and every thought and actions that are important, no matter how bad it makes you look. Always remember, that if you admit your own mistakes, chances are your partner will understand the circumstances and come up with a solution. However, if you bottle it up, things can eventually turn too bitter and reach a point where there is no turning back. Also, if your partner finds out about your mistake from other sources, it’d completely destroy their trust and they’ll lose faith from the loyalty of the relationship. So make the wise decision and share before its too late. Not deceiving or lying to your partner: perhaps the most sensitive aspect of a relationship, where the slightest changes can make everything fall apart. Many people think that cheating in a relationship is only restricted to having sexual or romantic connections with another person, however, the spectrum of cheating is much wider. What we need to realize is that every relationship consists of a set of guidelines from each partner. Like I said before, it is absolutely necessary for both of the lovers to share what they expect from the relationship, what they like, what they’re okay with and what they’re not.
Any action which falls outside your partner’s tolerance zone is considered as cheating when done without their knowledge. It is crucial to know that what might be “okay” in one relationship, might not be so in another. Some couples are okay with their significant others sharing platonic kisses on the cheeks of their friends, while other couples might be uncomfortable with it. Rule of thumb; if you’re aware that your partner is not comfortable with a certain gesture, do not do it. These simple steps can prove your loyalty to your partner. Flirting with other people, sneaking around to meet them, deleting evidence or texts from another person to stop your partner from seeing them; all these falls under cheating and are dishonest. You do not have to explicitly engage in a romantic relationship with somebody to be disloyal. The very moment you start breaking the limits of a relationship, the very moment you start doing things your lover won’t approve of, cheating begins. Thus meaning, you’re no longer loyal. To make sure you do not break his or her trust, stop right away when you’re engaging in actions that are disrespectful and unacceptable in a relationship. Lying to your partner is a complete no, no, and so is hiding facts. Remember, trust is only built upon honest truths. You cannot build a bridge with twigs; you cannot base a relationship upon lies. No matter what the situation is, always come clear to your partner. They are your better half, they have the right to know. Some of us tend to avoid speaking about the matter altogether, hide details or modify the facts in order to avoid blatantly “lying”, but trust me, this is just as bad. If I kill a bird, and never tell you about it, will it bring back its life? If I lie and say the bird is still alive, will it change anything? No. So remember lying and hiding will not change the fact ever, what it’d only do is make you a dishonest person who cannot be loyal in a relationship. Ask yourself, would you like being lied to, being cheated on? The answer is an obvious no. So treat your partner the way you want to be treated. The ultimate proof of loyalty comes in being there for each other, even through the darkest times. If you’ve already passed all the above criteria, know that this is the biggest test where most of us tend to fail. Sticking together and being loyal through thick and thin is what differentiates a healthy, happy, trusting relationship from a toxic one. When you love somebody and start a relationship, you sign an unwritten contract to be there for them no matter how many ups and downs comes through your way. Instead of hating or leaving your partner in their tough times, a loyal beau would stand still and provide support, encouragement, and compassion to the ones which matter to them most. Have your man just lost his job? Have you just found out that your wife is infertile? Times like these are excruciatingly painful, but how you handle it would tell us if you’re actually loyal and worthy or not. A true lover would not be repelled away by such devastating news. In fact, it is your job to realize that when things turn dark, the only person your partner can rely on is you. You’ll have to be the lighthouse that shows them the path through the wildest storms. Your loyalty and support should help them an anchor to the shore of love, and guide them till the clouds move away and the sun shines. Stick by your partner. Make some hot coffee and listen to their agony. Understand what they are going through. Cuddle through the night while you encourage them to try again, while you make sure they know that even if the whole world turns against them, they will still have you. Keep in mind, it’s ordinary to love the beautiful, but it is beautiful to love the ordinary.
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