No matter however straightforward the live-together create it looks, 83% of ladies say about relationship problems after moving in together.
-the study was done by UGallery
If you’re not prepared enough it’s surely not a good idea. The little things that come with the new level of living can easily ruin even the best relationship. Especially, If you can’t figure out how to share dog duty & what’s going to happen when you will share family time in holidays?
“This is why it’s so important to prevent the most common problems before you ever set foot over a shared threshold,”
says Wendy Walsh, Ph.D., relationship expert, and author of The 30-Day Love Detox.
Here, the top five issues couples faces & expert advice on how to deal with relationship problems after moving in together.
Being Non-paid 24/7 Maid
A recent study on “relationship problems after moving in together” found that
“Women still do the majority of housework after moving together. Almost in 90 percent of couples face this situation—though both of them are working.”
If that isn’t A-OK with you (how it could be?) most of the cases you can not change the tradition. Famous relationship expert Walsh suggests “to have a discussion before you even move in together about what is your and your mate’s responsibilities are going to be.”
We know coming up with a chore schedule is not exactly romantic, but then neither is spitefully scrubbing the dishes at midnight while imagining smothering him with his pillow.
In the cases of money, you should agree to at least split things 50/50 or have him pay a little bit more. If you do not concentrate on your financial independence it can be a noticeable relationship problem after moving in together
“Most men like to feel like a provider,” Walsh explains.
It may not be ok at first, but it has been pointed out that your relationship with your boyfriend/girlfriend isn’t the same as a roommate, so you shouldn’t treat moving in with him like choosing a tenant on Craigslist.
Moreover, you need to make you independent financially. Even though living together isn’t the same as being married, breaking up is often like a divorce—except without the legal protections.
A good first step is to keep your personal accounts in your name. So that your savings and credit history won’t be in trouble if things go south.
“But the best thing you can do is having a written agreement about how bills are going to be split.”
In traditional countries like India, Bangladesh, Chile etc. this point can be counted as offensive behavior towards the view of relationships.
But it’s very normal to be familiar with the Common Law or Common Property statutes in your state. Thus you can avoid the most dangerous relationship problems after moving in together.
“People expect to acquire to be like geological dating however with a lot of access to sex. However you wish to know that it eventually settles down.”
“It does not imply you are the severance of affection therewith person. However that you are moving to a deeper, calmer stage of affection.”
——–Famous relationship expart Walsh explains
This simply suggests that you wish to seek out ways in which to physically connect instead of expecting it to happen sequentially.
In addition, you must be receptive different ways in which of keeping one another glad.
“Don’t compare your drive together with his,”
“Men square measure like microwaves—quick to heat up and fast to finish—while girls square measure a lot of like crockpots.”
Taking advantage of quickies, lunch period meet-ups, and sexual perversion in between longer a lot of romantic sessions.
The toilet seat goes to left up. But it’s a big issue when one in each of you could be a user and the opposite could be a sitter. It’s disgusting on the point of view of women but usually, men do not take it very seriously. Nevertheless sharing a restroom does not need to be a tangle.
“deciding timely what you’ll be able to let slide (an empty toilet tissue roll or dentifrice within the sink?). Also, what you cannot (pee on the floor?). Understanding a restroom routine can take compromise on each of your components. However, no matter you are doing, do not nag. Neither you may find yourself with precisely the behaviors you do not wish.
“It’s far better to reward his/her smart habits than to stay reminding your mate of his/her unhealthy ones.”
Men are more careless than women in this cases. So, it’s better if you discuss it with your mate. Or you want to make an adjustment it is also cool.
No one wants zombie blood messing up their wedding gown. Especially when The Walking Dead conflicts with Say Yes to the Dress, right? But even though survey respondents were so worried about conflicting TV habits that it made the top five worries.
Though it does not show squabbles that are the real issue, how you handle conflict in general. There will be a million things to fight and often those fights start over something little, like the TV.
“You should never move in with someone until you have had at least one huge fight,” Expert advises.
It’s not so you can have great make-up sex but rather so you can see how you both handle conflict. Moreover, some couples counseling pre-move-in can be a great way to figure out how to resolve arguments.
Being Irritated By Each Other
You might not have noticed your partner’s messiness levels yet. After you start sharing a space when may get the idea. What was once cute, for instance, can suddenly seem extremely irritating when you deal with it every day.
“Over time, little things that grate on you … can turn into dealbreakers,”
Especially if you never take the time to discuss ways to possibly rectify these habits and live together in harmony.
“In many cases, solving this just involves a little communication and compromise,” Bennett says.
Since they’re little habits, they can be easily changed. Just be sure to speak up before things spiral out of control and everyone is frustrated and angry.
Own “Me” Time Plans
There’s nothing quite like transitioning from seeing each other a few times a week to seeing each other every single day. For some couples, this can be a rude awakening, especially if they haven’t braced themselves for such a big lifestyle change.
It can also turn out to be a dealbreaker if it comes to light that one partner requires a certain amount of alone time, while the other craves more attention. This can lead to hurt feelings and stress. Maybe even a breakup if it isn’t addressed early on.
Being able to talk openly and work out a plan for these issues will be crucial for your relationship going forward.
“State your needs, state your desires, and negotiate.”
“No negotiation is a dealbreaker.”
——clinical psychologist Dr. Josh Klapow. Host of The Web Radio Show.
At The End
In the end, figuring out the kinks is regarding sensible communication and expectations. “Research shows that happy cohabiting couples square measure ready to answer the necessary queries. Like wherever the link is headed additionally to the day to day stuff,” she says. “And if he (or you) is not willing to answer the onerous queries, then you almost certainly should not be acquiring along.”