Hey people! Here is a 30 second hack to end arguments. Now, keep in mind this technique, it is for mature people. You see, there are some people who are addicted to fighting, but if you truly seek to end conflict with your loved one, then this will work.
Step 1: Pause
Isn’t it when you get angry, you get hot? it feels like a fire, it is burning inside of you. Well, let that fire die down, through a pause. Bring your attention to this moment, not the past and also not the future, but right now. I’d like to do this by taking three deep breaths with your full attention, on your in breath and on your out breath, become your breath.
Step 2: Approach Your Loved One and Interlock/Cross your fingers with Their’s
Hold their hands for about 10 seconds. Do you know that there is a saying that it is impossible to be mad if you are holding hands? One study showed that the participants were able to cope better with pain and discomfort. When they are holding hands, or when they act of holding hands decrease the level of stress hormones like cortisol, in their body.
Step 3: Embrace Your Loved One for a Heart to Heart Hug
Imagine, you see your loved one to their eyes. As s/he comes closer to you, you catch eyes. You feel the hug is coming! You raise one arm, starting slightly and rising higher to move into the hug. Your wings are spread, ready to connect… and then you hug him/her tight.
Step 4: Synchronize
As you embrace your loved one, close your eyes and breathe deeply, match the tempo of your breathe with their’s, and become aware, that, you are alive.
Step 5: The Final Step
Now, as you are embracing your loved one i want you to think about where you and your loved one will be after three hundred years from now.
How does it feel?
What does it feel like to know that you and your loved one will one day be gone and forgotten?
After about 20 seconds or so, open your eyes. I guarantee that you will realize, just how precious it is to be alive. You are still here, your loved one is still here and you still do have an opportunity on this planet to chose love.
Now Ask Yourself: What You were Fighting About?
Really worth it?